Friday, September 22, 2006

Secret Baby Handshake

I am, among other things, what you might call a 'biker.’

I am a member of a motorcycle club – we drink, we ride, we carouse. Not necessarily in that order.

We are not a 1%’er club, but we are a brotherhood and we are committed to the cause, so to speak.

P.Pie and I have spoken at length about the motorcycle and it is our consensus that I have been riding a long time (longer than I’ve been driving), I’m cautious, I’m careful, and I will continue to ride.

In the biking community, there is a natural camaraderie; a shared interest in a sport that not everyone can do. While it’s not rocket science, it is a skill that not everyone has/wants. This kindredship is expressed in a friendly wave, or a nod of the head as two ‘bikers’ or ‘riders’ pass each other.

If you ride, you know what I am talking about. If you don’t ride, the next time you’re out, watch for two motorcycle riders passing each other. While the nod/wave doesn’t happen every time, it happens more times than not (many things get in the way – turning/signaling/traffic/etc).

Smokers share the same type of solidarity. One smoker will have no problem approaching another smoker, asking if they can ‘borrow’ a cigarette.

For better than half of my life I was a member in good standing of this association.

While I disassociated myself more than three years ago from the group, I am still approached by the wayward individual looking to take communion with me. In fact, you may have been approached by a smoker, asking if are part of the ’community’.

It is a group that is hard to get away from. And the dues are quite pricey, and continue to go up.

There are other groups that are more or less known; some you might even call secret societies.

Groups with names like Freemasons. Odd Fellows. Shriners. Moose. Elks. Illuminati. CIA. FBI. Phi Beta Kappa.

Girl Scouts.

Yes, even the Girl Scouts of America can be considered a secret society.

According to Merriam-Webster, a secret society is defined as "any of various oath-bound societies often devoted to brotherhood, moral discipline, and mutual assistance."

So by that definition - substituting 'sisterhood' for 'brotherhood,' of course - the Girl Scouts are an oath-taking, due-paying secret society operating directly under the nose of Americans everywhere. Not only successfully operating (have you ever heard of a den of Girls Scouts closing down?), but operating with the help and guidance of our mothers, sisters, girlfriends, and wives.

But that is neither here nor there, and truly off the point (one might even think I liked to spout off about nothing at all).

Anyhoo, back to my point; if motorcycle riders, smokers and girls between the ages of 7-14 can have a wave, a communion, and a cookie, respectively, shouldn’t soon-to-be-parents have something?

Maybe a specific waddle or even a shake of the belly could serve as a wink and a nod to people in the know.

...hang on...

It suddenly occurs to me that perhaps there is such a knowing nod, but I haven’t had anyone to introduce me to said nods.

Jesus, pregnancy is tough.