Monday, March 19, 2007

Wait, What Do You Mean You’re Leaving?

While shopping the other day, I saw this great red futon and thought - photo opportunity.

So I set her down, whipped out the camera and started snapping pics. As I watched The Squeaker, I thought, “Wow, these are going to be great photos!”

After the shoot was over, I loaded her up and we went about our shopping day.


After downloading the images, I noticed she’s missing a sock (see it there? her right foot?).

I carried her around, setting her down and picking her up and I didn’t even notice the missing sock. Wow.

For the last 30 days or so, we’ve had family hanging around... holding the baby, cooking our meals, holding the baby, cleaning our house, holding the baby, buying our groceries, holding the baby, folding our laundry, holding the baby, changing the baby… basically keeping a pair of socks on the girl at all times.

But today, the last of the family splitski; they took a powder, blew this pop stand, caught the last train to Clarksville… no, wait; that’s a Monkees song.

Anyway, my mother caught a 7am flight back home this morning, leaving us to our own devices with a one month old.

A one month old.

What the hell is she thinking about?! I’d forget to feed the dog if he didn’t paw the food dish every time he was ready to eat. Fortunately, I think P.Pie can remember to feed her…what with all the leaking.

But still.

Well I guess I’ve got’em bamboozled; hell, some people even complement me on my parenting skills.

Suckers.

My favorite type of comment goes something like this – “Oh, look! You (insert baby daddy duty here) so well! You are a great father!”

Uhm. I’m really just doing my job. I’d like to say, “Perhaps you should tell your baby’s father what being a daddy is supposed to be.”

But it comes out, “She’s a great girl, she’s just making me look good.”

Hmmm. Maybe there’s a lot of truth in that.

Of course, neither she nor I noticed the missing sock.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't worry - other parents will never think you are a bad parent when the time comes and you get frustrated with her in public or she falls off a chair in a restaurant or she throws a fit at the mall. They understand.

Just as you will now look at other parents in a different light - you will understand.

It is those damned childless people that are the problem. That's why us parents are always encouraging others to reproduce - so they understand us.

Well, that and so that everyone else is just as miserable as us ;)

3/20/2007 5:01 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...

Those dang baby socks are always coming off. I was lucky in that my firstborn came in May, so I didn't freak out about keeping her feet warm.

Our nextborn was a fall baby, so those socks were a necessity, but a reluctant necessity. All she'd have to do was wiggle a bit, and one of those socks would vanish, only to be found a month later when vacuuming under the couch cushions.

3/20/2007 5:08 AM  
Blogger Dara Lee said...

I used to wonder how people lost one mitt or one sock. Then I took my first son to the store. In the store, around the store, out of the store. His hat just vanished. Now I know that kids can just whip them off before you even notice it. My philosophy is that we were having too much fun to notice and that's what's important.

Oh, and Robeez shoes are the only way I can keep socks on my boys.

3/20/2007 9:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I still lose socks on a regular basis. Don't feel bad. You remembered the baby.

3/20/2007 12:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

venturing out with one sock. it might be time to report you to child protective services ;)

3/20/2007 2:46 PM  
Blogger Emily Clasper said...

When my little guy was one month old, I was already ready to glue those damn socks to his feet they fell off so many times.

And guess, what... his little toes never froze off, so I guess he was ok. :)

3/20/2007 9:04 PM  

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