Married w/Kids vs. Single

When you have kids, your friends without kids sort of fall off. They all say, “No, no! We’ll still come around!”

And for the first few weeks, they do.

But too soon, the phone stops ringing. Yes, they called you the last 17 times they were going out for cocktails. And 17 times you said, “Sorry, we (are beat/broke/sick) can’t make it… maybe next time.”

I guess by the 18th time, they know the answer.

Of course, there are the folks who continue to make the effort. Those are your real friends. And yes, you can still alienate them.

Let me tell how.

Your very good single friend comes over and you start to chit-chat. You start with the usual catch up stuff and then you move on to the pink elephant in the room – your baby. Pretty soon you’re arguing the finer points of minivans and fast bottle nipples for late night feeding.

Their eyes glaze over as they make surreptitious, fidgety glances at their watches. Then they beg off staying for dinner as they actually have plans to go out for the evening.

The really, really sad thing is that I know how boring my theory of night feedings is to the uninitiated. But. I. Can’t. Help. My. Self. I have to share it.

How long before I break out videos of The Squeaker sleeping or my poopy diaper comparison graph charts?

God, we really need to develop more friends with kids.

[ed.note: speaking of videos, here's one I shot with P.Pie's new cell phone... what a cool toy!]